Aussies Get Thier Excuses Ready
Posted by Jasper Reed in Australia, World Cup | 23 June 2006
And so, the dream goes on. For an Australian press so parochial it would make the Americans blush, and merchandisers of all things green and gold, the ‘Socceroos’ run to the second round of the World Cup is manna from heaven. This morning’s Croatia game (kick off 4.30am local time) is not the biggest news story; it’s the only news story. And a public that didn’t know Jason Culina from Jason Donavon 3 weeks ago can now pronounce Guus in perfect Flemish.
But do they know anything about football? Well, if they didn’t know anything before the World Cup started, not really. In order to get the public behind the team and engender the famous Australian ‘fighting spirit’, succeeding against the odds as plucky underdogs, the coverage has had to find the lowest common denominator, an opponent that the man in the street can relate to. The common enemy chosen are those formerly known as ‘the men in black’.
It all started after the warm up game against Holland, where the Dutch had 3 men stretchered off and Aussie winger Luke Wilkshire was sent off for attempting to relieve a Dutchman of his right kneecap. Reasonably, Marco van Basten gently questioned the ‘over physical nature’ of the Australians in what was a friendly. The press lapped it up. Soft Johnny Foreigner was questioning the fairness of our tough, brave boys, fighting against the odds etc etc. Guus (honourey Aussie this week, Johnny Foreigner next week) saw an opportunity to galvanise his squad. He claimed that any question of Aussies being dirty might give them a bad reputation with World Cup officials. As if Lucas Neill and Tim Cahill could be considered anything other than squeaky clean…
As a result, each match report has referred to the result (‘Our brave boys did themselves proud in the biggest EVER game for our nation’) the litany of referring mistakes (‘…that could have cost our brave boys dearly…’) and general jingoism (‘…our brave boys fighting against the odds….’). Little or no mention has been given the performance of the team, the performance of the opposition or the actual game.
Coverage of the Japan game consisted of how much of an error the referee made in allowing the Japanese goal after keeper Schwartzer was so ‘obviously’ fouled. Surprisingly, no mention of the stonewall penalty that the Japs were denied when already-yellow-carded Cahill found time between goals to scythe down an attacker in the 6 yard box. In truth, the game could so easily have been 2-1 Japan, with Cahill off the park.
Game 2 focused on Brazil’s 25 free kicks the Aussie’s 9. Ref Marcus Merk was said to have been ‘awestruck’ by the Brazilians. Merk did book Ronaldo for time wasting, though. Perhaps he should have done the same when Harry Kewell was swearing in his face. Unless he was too awestruck…
The Croatia game was always going to be delicate. With countless Aussie players having Croatian roots, and 3 Croats being born Down Under, the shirt swapping actually began before the game. News that Englishman Graham Poll was taking charge of the game was released with general approval on Tuesday. It’s the first time I can ever remember the name of a football referee being announced in the lead up to a game anywhere in the world, and an indication of just how serious our press was about this issue. Of course, Poll had a brain explosion in the last 5 minutes which only he can explain, but his involvement in countless penalty shouts, bookings and red cards has completely over shadowed Kalac’s disastrous goalkeeping display.
If we set aside ‘Australian fighting spirit’ as a meaningless media tagline (much like ‘Bulldog Breed’ and ‘Gallic Flair’) then the Aussie run has been exciting but, like South Korea and Turkey 4 years ago, they have succeeded only because of good coaching, good fortune and some outstanding performances (notably full backs Neill and Scott Chipperfield). Little has been made of Kewell’s inability to hit a cow’s backside, Viduka’s unwillingness to move his own sizeable posterior in a meaningful manner and the lack of invention in midfield. They have also lacked that little bit of experience/gamesmanship that earns other teams the edge in the free kick count (Viduka’s dives are not yet world standard). The Australian public are not yet sophisticated in these areas of the world game, and the press are too busy navel gazing to actually be informative, and so the sport is still looked upon in a naïve way. Still, Italy next. I’m sure they wont roll about in agony when tackled or try to waste time…
When Australia do bow out of Germany 06, someone will be to blame. We know his job.......all that remains is what colour shirt he was wearing...
Comments
Jasper, speaking of 'general jingoism,' have you ever read a British newspaper?
Your diatribe smacks of the petty jealousy.
Fond regards old chap.
Petty jealousy? Of what? We are also in the final 16, havent lost a game and are following up our quarter final finish in 2002. And what does that star mean on our shirt? (Clue; only 6 other teams can wear one)
The thing about the English press is they are anti English when things arent going well. We look inwardly for answers, unlike the antipodeans who find someone to blame, be it substitute fielders or match officials.
Thanks for proving my point.
JR
what a thoroughly interesting and accurate article. it has grated on me immensely the added support, and subsequently, added moronic views from fans who neither follow or know ANYTHING about football. the aussies seem to be the main culprits of this at the moment, followed closely by the americans. they will not, and probably can not, recognise simple and basic things within the game, such as the fact that lucas neill is an absolutely filthy player. i hope we do get them in the finals as neill has said he would like, as i am positive that we will teach them a footballing lesson. the only problem is, they won't be able to comprehend it!
